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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24666253">i remember when i left home (in that pearl cadillac)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Most_Green/pseuds/The_Most_Green'>The_Most_Green</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Riverdale - Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, M/M, also reggie’s a ghoulie whoops, betty cooper is a bamf in a pink leather jacket, but not for long, cheryl hates all the northsiders, fp is still serpent king, joaquin is an idiot in love too but he’s tryna be sly about it, jughead is trying not to pine and it’s not going very well, kevin is an idiot in love, mentions of past suicides, nobody likes hal cooper, some slow burn and some not at all slow burn, sweet pea is angry and bakes cupcakes, toni just wants everyone to calm the fuck down, veronica is annoyed and eats cupcakes, whoops it’s a Southside/Northside reverse au</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 05:14:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,715</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24666253</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Most_Green/pseuds/The_Most_Green</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>(Southsider/Northsider Reverse AU)</p><p>Southside Serpents Kevin, Betty, Veronica, and Cheryl prepare to endure a world of prejudiced Northsiders at Riverdale High. </p><p>Across the tracks, the kids of RHS try to bury their secrets and keep their worlds divided, but little does anyone know, a Romeo and Juliet tale has already begun, and it’s going to change everything for their friends. </p><p> </p><p>Title Song is Pearl Cadillac by Gary Clark Jr.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Betty Cooper/Jughead Jones, Cheryl Blossom/Toni Topaz, Choni - Relationship, Joaquin DeSantos/Kevin Keller, Joavin - Relationship, SweetVee - Relationship, Veronica Lodge/Sweet Pea, bughead</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Yes, I’m A Witch</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Thank you for taking the time to click on this chapter! </p><p>Everything is edited by yours truly.</p><p>Enjoy :)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Betty Cooper carefully scraped her change off the lunchroom table, savoring the defeated look on Veronica's face as she started to put up her playing cards.</p><p>“You’ve got to be kidding me. That’s four rounds in a row. You’re cheating,” Veronica said with a pout to her black painted lips. She tugged at the lapels of her leather jacket, proudly bearing the mark of the Serpents. Aside from the worn jacket, she was dressed to the nines. Her black patent heels were shined, her deep purple dress pressed into pleats. She was easily the most classily dressed among her little group of friends, which sat around her.</p><p>Betty sat across from her, drowning herself in her win. She too donned snake skin, but her jacket was a pale pink. She had torn holes in her fishnet tights, which she covered with a pair of lilac denim shorts. She pushed a strand of blonde hair out on her face.</p><p>“Maybe I am, but maybe I’m not. You’ll never know the truth,” Betty chided in response, her voice raised to cover the booming sounds of the Southside High Lunchroom. Some Ghoulie fight had broken out on the other side of the room.</p><p>Sitting to her left, Betty’s cousin, Cheryl, stood up and threw a can at the boys across the room. Somebody threw it back to her, but it landed half-heartedly about five feet from her seat. Cheryl stomped off to go slap the person responsible, Serpent jacket held over her shoulder with one hand, red heels clicking on the floor.</p><p>“Are we going to help her?” said Kevin, already half out of his seat, following his friend with his eyes.</p><p>Veronica placed a hand on Kevin’s arm.</p><p>“I think she’s got this one covered. Plus, she just wants somebody to hit. Better him than me.”</p><p>They watched with sly grins as Cheryl slapped the guy, once, twice, three times. One of his buddies started to get up to defend him, but quickly stopped when he saw the switchblade sticking out of Cheryl’s back pocket. It wasn’t the nice one she kept at home, but the one typically in her locker, so she didn’t have to sneak it past the metal detectors every morning. Most people knew not to mess with Cher, since she was almost always armed, under the Serpent’s protection, and also just scary to watch.</p><p>She was the one who taught Betty how to walk like a queen and scare everyone off while doing so. (“Shoulders back, chin up, sway your hips a little, and think of murder fondly.”) </p><p>Eventually, Cheryl returned to their table, tossing her long flame of hair over her shoulder. She ate a cold fry off of Kevin’s plate and sat down on the bench. Just then, the voice of their very tired principal came over the intercom.</p><p>“Cheryl Blossom, Elizabeth Cooper, Veronica Lodge, and Kevin Keller, please report to the principal’s office,” he said with little enthusiasm.</p><p>Kevin took his leather clad feet off the lunchroom table, sighing and shoving his phone back into the pocket of his jeans.</p><p>Betty threw her bag on to her shoulder, dreading what was to come. “What did we do this time?”she wondered aloud. No one answered her immediately.</p><p>They just gathered their things in silence.</p><p>Kevin waited idly and rested his elbow on V’s head, only to be pushed off a second later. The four of them headed off to the office after dropping their trays in the garbage, which really needed to be taken out, but no one around here was going to do it. </p><p>Starting down the hall, Betty traced the cracks in the walls with her eyes. She followed the scuff marks with her feet. She swallowed, and found that her throat was dry. They speculated what they were in trouble for on the way, until Betty had ultimately ruled out pranks, fights, being checked out by their parents, and random acts of praise. She wondered what she was going to find in there. Maybe Principal Ashworth was finally giving her the chance to have a Southside High newspaper. She doubted it. The office door’s hasn’t been opened in fifteen years, and she was most likely the only kid at Southside who knew where it was.</p><p>When they arrived, the secretary let them in without a word or a smile. She just lazily pointed towards a small office in the back, with a faded banner reading “Happy Teacher Appreciation Week!” above the door. </p><p>The principal motioned them in with a little wave of his hand. Betty noticed that he had some pretty bad hangnails, but decided not to tell him. Cheryl and Veronica sat down in the chairs across from their principal’s, and B and Kev stood close behind them. </p><p>“Students,” Principal Ashworth began, “can I tell you something in confidence?”</p><p>No one responded, but he told them anyway.</p><p>“Southside High is closing. There’s been too many drug busts. Too many suspensions, not to mention that we’re horribly underfunded. We’re set to close our doors in four weeks, but I want to send a small group of upperclassmen to Riverdale High and Seaside High to get their kids used to our kids. You are my selected juniors to transfer to Riverdale High. You have some of our highest GPAs and if Miss Cooper doesn’t get off my back about a school paper, I think I might hemorrhage,” he grumbled. </p><p>Betty’s face lit up when she heard that. So did Veronica’s.</p><p>B knew that V wanted more than anything to be on a cheer team for a winning school. Cheryl didn’t look so pleased. </p><p>She looked pale, more so than was normal for her. Her bottom lip was trapped between her teeth and her hands folded awkwardly in her lap. Betty watched her and fought the urge to reach out to her. She knew what her cousin was thinking. She had went to Riverdale High for her freshman year. She had hated it so much that she transferred, even though she didn’t have too. </p><p>That was the year Jason died.</p><p>That was also the year Polly died.</p><p>Betty’s stomach roiled a little. Cheryl’s parents hated that Cheryl’s twin, Jason, had been dating a Cooper girl. A southsider. A serpent. Nothing but a bad descision. Betty and Polly’s parents hated that Polly was dating a northsider.</p><p>Betty’s father had thrown glass bottles at the wall as he screamed at Polly over it. It was a good thing that Hal had bad aim.</p><p>
  <em> Northsiders don’t want Serpents in their blood, Polly! You’re going to get yourself killed up there. You better break it off with him! </em>
</p><p>Polly didn’t do as she was told. Eventually, she got pregnant at sixteen, a year older than Jason.</p><p>Then it came out that the Coopers and the Blossoms were related. Alice told her she was a slut. Hal told her that he wished Alice had swallowed her. (Alice didn’t hear that part.) Polly spent a night locked in the bathroom of their apartment, all to avoid her mother and father. She never drew breath beyond that door again. Jason shot himself less than a week later. He had lost his girl and his child. Betty had heard the fights retold in vivid imagery.</p><p>
  <em>We were going to get married, Father! We were going to go down south, to the Georgia Coast, and raise a family there! We were going to run away together. </em>
</p><p><em>Jason, don’t you ever even think of a Serpent Princess again, or you’ll never be my son again!</em> </p><p>Jason was the only thing Cheryl had ever truly loved. She walked out of Thornhill and never looked back, moved in with V on the Southside.</p><p>Riverdale High was a place of bad memories for her. She hated seeing Jason’s face and jersey number plastered around the stadium, over his locker door, in the paper.</p><p>Betty became the closest thing she had to sister, just as Betty had lost hers. Kevin became their closest confidant and the person who brought the tequila but stayed the designated driver. Veronica was there to give them advice at the end of the day and help them feel better with cupcakes from her favorite bakery and a shopping trip. They had become quite the family.</p><p>Before anyone could say otherwise, Betty assumed Polly’s unofficial title Serpent Princess (much to her opposition), and Veronica, who’s father kept the Serpents in comfortable homes, souped up cars, and fine leather, fought to get Cheryl official membership, for protection.</p><p>Needless to say, they got it.</p><p>Cheryl looked up at the principal with a newfound sadness in her eyes, but Betty didn’t miss the determination on her face as the air around her turned to fire.</p><p>“When do we start?” Cheryl asked with fake enthusiasm and a little bit of anger.</p><p><em>Oh boy, here we go,</em> Betty thought.</p><p>✦ૢ✧∘*✦</p><p>“No. No way. They can’t put Southsiders in this school,” Sweet Pea exclaimed, practically on the verge of yelling, “You know what they’ve done to people. Toni, Fangs, back me up on this one. Jug, they’re bad news.”</p><p>No one immediately came to his rescue.</p><p>Joaquin was clearly not paying attention, staring down at his phone and smirking a little, which was something Jughead decided to file away and ask about later.</p><p>Toni and Fangs were trying not to look at anyone. The five of them were sitting outside of Riverdale High, standing between Toni’s and Fangs’s cars.</p><p>They had been in the auditorium minutes ago, being told that they would be getting transfers from Southside.</p><p>Jughead scoffed. “Oh come on, they can’t be that bad. They come into your bakery all the time. You have eyes. You can see that snake on their backs. Fangs and I live near them, and they’ve never tried to mess with us.”</p><p>Joaquin lit a cigarette and said, “Maybe that’s because your old man would put their heads on a stake if they hurt you. You’re his kid after all, and Fangs is your partner in crime. The same isn’t true for us. We aren’t protected from whatever the hell they’re doing across the tracks.” </p><p>“They killed my grandfather!” Sweet Pea yelled. He was red in the face, on the verge of tears. Sweet Pea didn’t cry often, mostly to keep looking scary. They all sat there in a sort of tense silence after that. Sweet Pea was trying to pretend he wasn’t crying.</p><p>Jughead was trying to figure out how the hell he was going to fix this.</p><p>
  <em>They can’t possibly be that bad. All they do is sell a little JJ. </em>
</p><p>Well, he couldn’t say that. That’s not true. Everyone knows that the Serpents deal more than that, and also that they’ve been known to defend their honor in some less than civil ways.</p><p>
  <em>The kids aren’t like the parents.</em>
</p><p>There’s no way of guaranteeing that.</p><p>
  <em>Maybe we can just avoid them. </em>
</p><p>Sweet Pea couldn’t avoid a fight if the life of a newborn kitten depended on it.</p><p>More silence.</p><p>Toni fidgeted with the hem of her jacket and pulled her socks up a little.</p><p>Joaquin took a break from smoking his cigarette to put himself into the conversation. What he had to offer was: “Yeah.”</p><p>Jughead didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t good with words when it came to speaking. It seemed that Toni and Fangs we’re feeling the same way.</p><p>Eventually Fangs spoke up. </p><p>“Maybe Sweets is right. Jug, you might be a little biased.”</p><p>Jughead’s blood turned cold. “I’m not my father. I haven’t even seen him in months. I am not in favor of Serpents just because he’s Serpent King! I’m not necessarily in favor of them at all.” Toni wrung her hands together stop her powder blue mini skirt. “Can’t we just go to Pop’s and cool off for a little while? If there’s one thing you can agree on, it’s a nice greasy cheeseburger,” she asked, even though it wasn’t a question. She was a full head shorter than any of the boys, but she could still easily make them all do whatever she wanted. She steeled her face and looked up at Sweet Pea.</p><p>“You’re riding with me.”</p><p>“No I’m not.”</p><p>“Yes you are.”</p><p>After a little bit more bickering, Sweet Pea got in Toni’s car, and Jughead and Joaquin got in Fangs’s, and they headed off to Pop’s Choc’lit Shoppe.</p><p>Fangs let Jughead dig through the plastic crate of CD’s and cassettes sitting in the backseat. Jughead flopped through a bout fifteen thousand times, trying to stall the part where Fangs tries to talk to him about Sweet Pea. He really didn’t want to discuss it, so he postponed until it was obvious that he had looked at this The Glorious Sons CD roughly six times, and slid it into the slot on the stereo.</p><p>He flipped through the tracks until he found his favorite on this album, which was called “Kill The Lights”.</p><p>Fangs sighed louder than necessary. He was definitely trying to be heard over the guitar that was screaming over the speakers that Jug had turned up too high.</p><p>He looked out the window and watched Riverdale pass by in flashes. Pretty, picturesque homes. Downtown stores and coffee shops. The library. Pop’s was in the center of town, and wasn’t considered a Southside or Northside property, so he really hoped they didn’t see any Serpents at Pop’s to set Sweet Pea off. Somehow, he didn’t feel that fate was on his side.</p><p>Jughead snapped back to reality when Fangs turned down the music and breathed, “You’re being a dumbass.”</p><p>“Probably,” Jughead snapped back, “but that’s nothing new, is it?” Joaquin clapped the boy right on his knit beanie and told the air around him that Sweet Pea wasn’t going to change his mind. Fangs mumbled an agreement.</p><p>Jughead pulled his beanie over his eyes and slumped down in the passenger seat. He still felt the bass shaking his bones, just turned down. He focused on the beat for a few moments. “Do you think it really was them who shot his grandpa?” Jughead inquired. </p><p>“I mean, who has a motive to kill an old man who works at a bakery and serves the public? Not anyone I can think of. Maybe it was the Serpents. Maybe it wasn’t.”</p><p>No one had anything else to say, so they rode in silence under the guise of rock music the rest of the way to Pop’s.</p><p>✦ૢ✧∘*✦</p><p>
  <span>Joaquin was so done with trying not to smile. It had started at that damn assembly. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>A plan has been put into place to gradually welcome the kids of Southside High into our fine school. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He was almost giddy. He would have to call Kevin later to ask what wave of kids he was coming in. Kevin would probably reply with some sarcastic remark. He’d call him “Preppy” or “Old Navy” or whatever he felt like. Joaquin didn’t care what Kevin called him, as long as he was coming to RHS.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No one knew that Joaquin had been making out with a Serpent behind The Drive In or at the Bijou or in said Serpent’s car at Lover’s Lane.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Certainly no one knew that Kevin had asked him to go steady two months and thirteen days ago, not that anyone was counting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>(He definitely was.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sweet Pea was probably going to kill him when he went public with it, whenever that was. Joaquin was having a hard time convincing himself to care.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was zoned out, thinking of all this quite fondly, when Toni stuck a straw into his root beer float, which he was just now realizing had arrived.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Earth to ‘Quin. Anyone alive up there?” She droned as she fussed with the pink ribbon that was tying her hair up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I haven’t been alive since about 2012. The Mayans were right.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fangs let out a short laugh, and Jughead shoved about fifteen more fries down his throat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Joaquin watched as Jughead’s eyes got wider and he stopped chewing. He followed Jug’s eyeline and—</span>
  <em>
    <span>sweet baby Jesus.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>There was Kevin. At the door, four Southside Serpents, complete with leathers and a general air of tension. Serpents may be welcome at Pop’s, but they definitely made the air feel stale.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now he was staring too. Kevin had bought a new pair of jeans and a belt with studs on it. They were a pretty light wash color with a hole in one knee.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sweet Pea grumbled something as he turned around to sling his arm over the back of the booth. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kevin quirked a brow at him from across the restaurant, flicking his eyes form Joaquin to Sweet Pea to Jughead and then to Toni, who was now also staring.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guys—“ Fangs began.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, is there a problem?” A red haired girl shot in their direction, effectively cutting him off. Now Kevin’s friends were staring too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde Serpent pushed her way to the front, pink leather hanging over her shoulders. She stalked towards them with a look on her face that made Joaquin a little scared. He looked over at Pea, who looked really pissed, and Jug, whose Adam’s Apple bobbed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kevin followed the blonde in hot pursuit, albeit significantly less murderously. He placed a hand on her elbow, which she shoved off.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The girl arrived at their table and surveyed each’s appearances. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you lot go to Riverdale High?” she said with disinterest. She reached over the table and pulled a fry off of Jughead’s plate. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>No one said anything for a moment while she ate the fry.</span>
</p><p>“Yeah,” Joaquin mumbled, which was obviously super cool and helpful. He looked at Kevin, who was watching the blonde with a little bit of worry in his eyes.</p><p>
  <span>“I’m Betty Cooper,” she declared and extended her hand to Joaquin. “Me and my friends here start there on Monday.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Betty, don’t bother with them. They’re gonna hate us regardless of how you bore into their souls.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A girl appeared behind Betty. Her eyes flicked over the table’s occupants as she twirled a strand of raven hair around her finger.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, if we’re going to go to school with them, Ronnie, we might as well get to know them a little.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sweet Pea waved his hands in the air and turned a little pale. “Woah now, wait a second. Don’t tell me that you’re the first wave.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, Junior class, fuckwad. Got a problem with it?” spat the girl—Ronnie, with a wave of a perfectly manicured hand. She slid a hand into her pocket, and Joaquin was suddenly afraid of what she might draw out. All of her friends, excluding Kevin, seemed to have the same idea.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sweet Pea was climbing over the back of the booth before anyone could stop him, and then Toni was trying to pull him back in, and failing, probably because she wasn’t even half his weight and he towered a foot and a half taller than her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he was pissed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What did you say, snake?”</span>
</p><p>The girl with the red hair, the one who had yelled first, jumped in front of Ronnie. Joaquin barely registered her hand moving before there was a switchblade in her hand, pointed at Sweet Pea’s gut.</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Back. The. Fuck. Up.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>“Cheryl—“</p><p>
  <span>“No, Kevin,” Cheryl said between gritted teeth. “All of you, back the fuck up, and let’s take this outside.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kevin looked at Joaquin, who was already looking up at him for an answer to a question they were both asking.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>How do we get our friends to not kill each other?</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Stop the Raindrops</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>I’m sorry this took longer than expected to come out. I don’t have an excuse so you’ll just have to take note of my love for you for clicking on this chapter :)</p><p>Title: Stop the Raindrops- The Incredibles</p><p>——<br/>Veronica uncrossed her arms and opened them wide, welcoming him to see if she might bite. </p><p>“Do we have a deal?” She asked, bravado in her voice.</p><p>Sweet Pea looked back at the girl with the pink ribbons in her hair, then at Jughead, then at Fangs, and finally at the one that Kevin was staring at. They didn’t say anything. They only spoke with their eyes.</p><p>“I’m sorry, I’ve got to say,” Jughead said, almost grinning. “You guys are making this sound so serious. It’s literally high school.”</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“What did you say, snake?”</p><p> </p><p>The girl with the red hair, the one who had yelled first, jumped in front of Ronnie. Joaquin barely registered her hand moving before there was a switchblade in her hand, pointed at Sweet Pea’s gut.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Back. The. Fuck. Up.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“Cheryl—“</p><p> </p><p>“No, Kevin,” Cheryl said between gritted teeth. “All of you, back the fuck up, and let’s take this outside.”</p><p> </p><p>Kevin looked at Joaquin, who was already looking up at him for an answer to a question they were both asking.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> How do we get our friends to not kill each other? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>✦ૢ✧∘*✦</p><p> </p><p>In the end, it didn’t matter if they wanted to take it outside, because Pop threw them out about half a minute after Cheryl pulled that switch out.</p><p> </p><p>They were all standing there now, under the neon lights of Pops, the sun hidden by clouds, the sky dark. They were soaked to the bone with a torrential downpour. Veronica’s hair was sticking to her face and neck, crawling up her shoulders like snakes. </p><p> </p><p>That’s what he called her, right?</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Snake. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Well, he’s not wrong.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Veronica Lodge was in fact, a serpent. She didn’t hide it. She wore it with pride. She bore the tattoo above her left breast. </p><p> </p><p>She was a serpent by blood. </p><p> </p><p>But, given that, she wasn’t entirely sure she was willing to spill that blood on her new skirt in a burger joint parking lot—even if it was the best burger joint in the Northern United States. </p><p> </p><p>Don’t fight her on that one. She’ll stand her ground.</p><p> </p><p>Veronica surveyed the big oaf standing about five feet away from her, looking down at her. She only came up about halfway up his chest. He was wearing a tee shirt for a band that she would bet he didn’t listen too. He seemed like that kind of person.</p><p> </p><p>Veronica knew him. </p><p> </p><p>Sweet Pea.</p><p> </p><p>Peter Oswald.</p><p> </p><p>He worked after school at the Side Street Bakery near the train tracks. He said hello to her when she came in but sneered at her back. </p><p> </p><p>She also knew that his grandfather met an unfortunate end, and he blamed The Serpents for it. He hated all Serpents because of it. </p><p> </p><p>The last thing of importance that she knew about Peter Oswald was that he wasn’t worth her time.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> But hot damn, wouldn’t it be nice to see him squirm a little?  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“Look, I didn’t come here to find a fight,” she started, shifting her weight to the other foot and crossing her arms. </p><p> </p><p>“Well, he sure as hell did,” her fireball housemate replied. Cheryl was staring down the rest of the northsiders with her best Queen of Hearts look. Jughead looked a little green because of it.</p><p> </p><p>Veronica weighed her options.</p><p> </p><p>No one was allowed to touch Jughead Jones. FP had made them all swear on that when they were welcomed into serpent culture.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Maybe he doesn’t want to be, but that’s my boy. Don’t hurt my boy, no matter how bad you beat his little northsider schoolmates, are we straight? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Sir, yessir. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>If she started a fight, she could only really take out her anger on Sweet Pea. Those other m.c.m.i.’s (“Middle class and mildly interesting”—ask Kevin. He made it up and his friends had just adopted it.) didn’t have anything to do with this whole thing. Most of them were just trying to get Sweet Pea to calm the hell down.</p><p> </p><p>She would try to leave the rest of them out of it.</p><p> </p><p>“Look, Sour Pear—“ </p><p> </p><p>“Sweet Pea.”</p><p> </p><p>“I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but it seems that you are unarmed, so I think we ought to just settle this the old fashioned way.”</p><p> </p><p>She saw Jughead smile at the Shakespeare reference out of the corner of her eye. He reminded her of Betty with worse fashion in some odd way. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m not gonna fight a bunch of girls in heels,” Sweet Pea said with a grin.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, I didn’t think you would. It would be humiliating on your part,” Betty piped up.</p><p> </p><p>“No, no, no. The old fashioned way is this: we stop getting our clothes all wet, have a civilized conversation, and go home,” Veronica said slowly.</p><p> </p><p>“Now, Sticky Plum, I know you don’t like Serpents—<em> Snakes, </em>as you call them. That’s fine. I frankly do not care what you think about me or any of my friends. On the contrary, this,” she said, gesturing to his balled fists and the rain above her. She took a step towards him.</p><p> </p><p>“This will not do. We are starting at Riverdale High on Monday and there’s not a damned thing any one of us can do about it. I know that you’re not the only Northsider who thinks their white picket fence and pastel sweaters makes them better than us, but we don’t need to walk on each other’s feet all the time.</p><p> </p><p>“I didn’t plan on clashing with you any more then strictly necessary, and I’m sorry that my girl, C here, started talking to you idiots in the first place. I’m sorry that we got kicked out of Pop’s. I’m sorry about all of that, and I hope we can tolerate each other in the future.”</p><p> </p><p>Veronica uncrossed her arms and opened them wide, welcoming him to see if she might bite. </p><p> </p><p>“Do we have a deal?” She asked, bravado in her voice.</p><p> </p><p>Sweet Pea looked back at the girl with the pink ribbons in her hair, then at Jughead, then at Fangs, and finally at the one that Kevin was staring at. They didn’t say anything. They only spoke with their eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry, I’ve got to say,” Jughead said, almost grinning. “You guys are making this sound so serious. It’s literally high school.”</p><p> </p><p>“Really. This is riveting. I can’t breathe. I feel like I’m in a teen drama,” he added.</p><p> </p><p>Nobody said anything for a few seconds as they all looked at Jughead. He shoved his hands in his pockets and suddenly found something very interesting about his Converse.</p><p> </p><p>Behind Veronica, Betty let out a laugh. Jughead’s head jerked up. Veronica’s partner in crime was laughing at some stupid boy’s joke. She sighed.</p><p> </p><p>“B, what are you—“ Kevin began.</p><p> </p><p>The girl with the pink ribbons cut him off, because now she was laughing too. She stepped a little farther forward, adjusting the waist of her skirt and folding her hands together. </p><p> </p><p>“I mean really, guys,” the girl said, “It’s not like we don’t have Ghoulies in our school. Mantle’s always selling JJ and he’s got that tattoo on his shoulder.”</p><p> </p><p>Sweet Pea turned around to face her, serious as a heart attack. “Toni, they’re murderers.”</p><p> </p><p>“Hey, I’ve never killed anybody. It gets blood everywhere,” Kevin said.</p><p> </p><p>Cheryl scoffed and rolled her eyes. “You got blood <em> all over </em> my comforter, so don’t say you’re scared of it.”</p><p> </p><p>“There was blood all over the comforter because you broke my nose,” he fired back with a furrowed brow. </p><p> </p><p>“You started it.”</p><p> </p><p>“Well, they don’t want to be in our way, and we don’t want to be in theirs, so we can just keep our distance,” the girl said, crossing her arms.</p><p> </p><p>Toni walked past Sweet Pea, who tried to grab her arm, only to be shoved off. She stood in front of Veronica, extending her hand. “By the way, I’m Toni Topaz. I’m supposed to give you four the tour on Monday, so I guess you can’t get rid of me until after then.”</p><p> </p><p>✦ૢ✧∘*✦</p><p> </p><p>Jughead Jones’s head was an utter mess. So many thoughts were flying around that he couldn’t seem to focus on one on the car ride home. Fangs and Joaquin were talking, although it seemed a little one sided. The radio was off.</p><p> </p><p>She laughed at his joke.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> His joke. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Was it really even a joke?  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sweet Pea was about to beat somebody up.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Jesus. Are all my friends going to get suspended?  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>I’m pretty sure Joaquin was eyeing that guy in a more-than-friendly-way.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Was that where he had been sneaking off too when he stopped going to football games?  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Despite having done nothing all day, he was exhausted. He got to the trailer all right. FP hadn’t lived there in years, so Jug stayed there for the most part. </p><p> </p><p>There were a lot of memories in these walls. Good ones, bad ones, everything in between. He glanced at the photo on the shelf in the living room. It was the only one with the dust wiped off. </p><p> </p><p>Him, his mother, Jellybean.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> It’s JB now. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Sure, kid. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He had heard they were off in Toledo. Then he heard they moved to New York, then to Cleveland.</p><p> </p><p>Jughead had stopped keeping track when his mother stopped accepting his calls and Jelly stopped mailing him drawings and books. </p><p> </p><p>Oh God, he didn’t need this right now. He needed to go to bed.</p><p> </p><p>He pulled his sweater over his head and threw the maroon material over the chair at his desk. The light was dim, but just bright enough to see the details of his room. He’d probably wake up in the middle of the night and think that sweater was a person sitting in his chair. He did that a lot.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> She laughed at me—with me. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Her hair is the same color as polished gold dipped in sunlight. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>No. No he is not thinking about his father’s best friend’s daughter who also happens to be in a gang who <em> also </em>happened to pull a fry off his plate and laugh with him and—</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Stop. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He pulled his jeans off and wrapped his belt around the bedpost, set his tennis shoes under the bed. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> You are being so bloody extra, Jughead. Stop.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He tried to read for a little while when sleep escaped him. He tried, and failed, and ended up smoking at midnight and higher than a kite.</p><p> </p><p>No big deal.</p><p> </p><p>She’s not <em> that </em>pretty.</p><p> </p><p>You really should hate her.</p><p> </p><p>She smells like peaches.</p><p> </p><p>Her dad is a fucking murderer. She’s probably a serial killer. </p><p> </p><p>She’s Betty Cooper.</p><p> </p><p>Boy, is Jughead gone.</p><p> </p><p>✦ૢ✧∘*</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Kevin-8:43 PM</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Well, that was wild.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Is that really the best you got? There’s nothing else better that you can think to say to him?  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Kevin Keller was brewing with the fact that he just had a confrontation with a bunch of Northsiders in a burger joint parking lot. His favorite Atomic Blonde seemed to be doing the same thing, sitting cross legged on his carpet, scrubbing her blue nail polish off with a soaked cotton ball. </p><p> </p><p>As well as he knew Betty, he knew she was just passing the time and trying not to think very much. She glanced up at the small TV sitting on the folding table by the bathroom door. It was playing an episode of Law and Order that they had both already seen. </p><p> </p><p>He thought about RHS.</p><p> </p><p>Kevin is about thirty five percent sure that he is going to die the moment he sets foot in Riverdale High on Monday morning. Two days away, and he’s not prepared in the slightest.</p><p> </p><p>He decided to make a list of possibilities.</p><p> </p><p>     1. That Sweet Pea guy beats the ever loving shit out of you because he finds out that you’ve been banging his best friend.</p><p> </p><p>Shit.</p><p> </p><p>    2. You are confronted by some other Northsiders and subsequently shunned from all possible social circles outside of your three friends and boyfriend, who will pretend to shun you because you’re paranoid about that.</p><p> </p><p>Double shit.</p><p> </p><p>     3. They have a terrible theatre program.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Triple shit. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>This is an awful list. </p><p> </p><p>Kevin had his feet draped across the back of the couch, his boots by the door of his apartment above the Whyte Wyrm. His head is propped up on a green velvet pillow, matching the couch itself. He rubbed a thumb over the fraying edges of the baby quilt laying across his torso. </p><p> </p><p>His phone buzzed and he jumped to grab it off the coffee table.</p><p> </p><p>Betty jumped too.</p><p> </p><p>“Geez Kev.”</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Joaquin &lt;3- 8:46 PM</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>to say the least. have u had dinner yet? </b>
</p><p> </p><p>He texts back immediately.</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Kevin-8:46 PM</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Nope. Do I have plans?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Joaquin &lt;3- 8:47 PM</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>mom made stuffed peppers, want me to bring u a plate to the tdi?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>The Twilight Drive-In had become their meet up spot, considering Kevin wouldn’t be allowed in the Desantos home for a slew of reasons, and Joaquin probably shouldn’t be seen at the Wyrm. </p><p> </p><p>The Drive-In was a common place for either one of them to be, and the parking lot had a corner hidden by kudzu and trees. </p><p> </p><p>Betty has turned around to watch him for a second. He knew he was smiling and he couldn’t stop himself. </p><p> </p><p>Fuck. Look serious.</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Kevin-8:47 PM</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>I’ll meet you there in ten. Drive safe &lt;33</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Joaquin &lt;3- 8:47 PM</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>k, u too &lt;3 :)</b>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>He pulled his boots back on, fumbled with the laces a little bit. Betty set down her cotton ball.</p><p> </p><p>“Where are you going?”</p><p> </p><p>Kevin searched for a lie.</p><p> </p><p>“The grocery store,” he said, a little too loud.</p><p> </p><p>Smooth.</p><p> </p><p>“Misty needs a bottle of aspirin and her cycle’s broken, so she asked me to run to the corner store and get it.”</p><p> </p><p>“Mhm.”</p><p> </p><p>Betty looked at her friend, clearly not believing him. She pushed herself off the floor, dusting her hands off on her shorts. “Are you going to be back or should I go ahead and go to V and C’s?”</p><p> </p><p>He knew she wasn’t going home tonight. She couch surfed probably a little more than she should. He decided not to bring it up.</p><p> </p><p>“If I’m back, it’ll be late,” he said, then trying to figure out what other time consuming thing he could do. “Tall Boy told me to go hit the corner of Winston and Little Chapel Road.”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Please buy it. Please buy it. Please buy it. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Betty looked at him thoughtfully for a moment, emerald green eyes forcing their way into his brain and digging through the rubble.</p><p> </p><p>“If you’re going to lie to me, you should at least try to make it believable,” she said with a chuckle.</p><p> </p><p>“What? What do you mean?”</p><p> </p><p>Her face fell into an expression not unlike a slab of stone. Unrelenting. No nonsense.</p><p> </p><p>“Winston Street and Little Chapel Road don’t intersect. You can’t possibly be going to sell there.”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Shit. Shit. Shit. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Betty kept up her serious face a moment longer before cracking a prize winning smile. </p><p> </p><p>“I’ll let you off this time,” she began, ”but eventually you’re gonna have to tell me his name.”</p><p> </p><p>And without another word, Betty Cooper picked you her coat and left Kevin’s apartment, giggling a little bit as she went.</p><p> </p><p>Kevin felt lighter than air and somehow simultaneously like a bag of rocks.</p><p> </p><p>✦ૢ✧∘*✦</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>“Bloody hell. You didn’t tell me they were showing Carrie again.”</p><p> </p><p>“It’s a classic,” Joaquin groaned from his position, hanging halfway out of Kevin’s car to watch the opening scene. This was a terrible spot to actually <em> watch </em> the movie. Damn, his ribs were aching.</p><p> </p><p>“Just because it’s a Stephen King adaptation does not make it good. Also, the musical is way better,” Kevin replied, slurping his slushie obnoxiously loud.</p><p> </p><p>Joaquin watched him out of the corner of his eye, a vision in denim and leather, hair slicked back and eyes wide. </p><p> </p><p>“You’re watching it pretty closely considering that you hate it.”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, shut up. This part’s okay.”</p><p> </p><p>“Mhm,” Joaquin agreed, seeing his lie and deciding to let him bicker over it.</p><p><br/>Later.</p><p><br/>He pulled himself back through window and into his seat. Joaquin reaches over and grabbed the lapels of Kevin’s jacket and pulled him to his chest. <br/><br/></p><p>“As lovely as I’m sure this conversation is about to be, I’ve got better ideas,” he said with a grin before crashing their mouths together.</p><p> </p><p>Kevin put his hands behind Joaquin’s head, fingers winding in the locks that curled at the bottom of his neck. His tongue begged entrance and Joaquin allowed it, already feeling his lips getting sensitive as he leaned into the bruising kiss.</p><p> </p><p>When they finally broke, Kevin smiled down at him, “That’s one way to shut me up.”</p><p> </p><p>Joaquin couldn’t keep himself from laughing into the next kiss.</p><p> </p><p>They stayed like that for quite some time, and only broke because Joaquin pushed him off a little bit.</p><p> </p><p>”Oh, come on,” Kevin whined.</p><p> </p><p>Joaquin scoffed, but still smiled at him. ”I’m hungry,” he replied.</p><p> </p><p>“Booooo-riiing. Can I have some more later?”</p><p> </p><p>“Maybe. If you’re a good boy.”</p><p> </p><p>”Okay, now that’s asking a little too high of me, DeSantos.”</p><p> </p><p>He was half listening to the movie and half listening to Kevin talk whenever he heard a bang on the back of Kev’s car.</p><p> </p><p>Kevin almost choked on his slushie and stuck his head out the window to look back half of the car.</p><p> </p><p>Joaquin heard him almost groan at what he saw. Kevin flew out of the car, turning back to mumble a “Stay low,” to Joaquin. </p><p> </p><p>Joaquin, ever the genius, did not stay low. Instead, he opted to very noisily throw himself into the backseat and stare out the window of the car. </p><p> </p><p>On the other side of the glass, Chuck Clayton paused his making out with Josie McCoy to say “Wait a minute, what?”</p><p> </p><p>✦ૢ✧∘*✦</p><p> </p><p>“Okay, so you’re cheating on Archie with Chuck, to get back at Archie for cheating on you Midge Klump, and you thought this was Malachi’s car?”</p><p> </p><p>“No, we thought this was <em> Moose’s </em> car, and Moose and Archie have second period together, and they’re pretty tight, so I figured that Moose would tell Archie when he saw him,” Josie explained, now stretched out across Kevin’s backseat with Joaquin.</p><p> </p><p>“Huh. Is there some kind of dark romance thing too or is it just making out on random strangers’ cars?” Joaquin propped his head on his hands, swinging his knees up so he could sit Indian style.</p><p> </p><p>“Do you really think I’d choose him, out of all the guys at RHS?” Josie replied, almost looking offended.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey,” said Chuck, now in the passenger seat. “I have emotional depth and maturity.”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, that of a dinner plate.”</p><p> </p><p>Kevin smiled back at her.</p><p> </p><p>“You know, I think I’m going to like you all right, McCoy,” he said with a shake of his pointed finger.</p><p> </p><p>“Okay, so now that that’s out of the way, are y’all like, a gay version of Grease, or are you just casually eating peppers and watching Carrie together as friends?”</p><p> </p><p>Joaquin started to say something, but was left with his mouth open. He wasn’t even out yet. Was he really going to confess his love for Kevin to two people he hadn’t spoken five words to since the beginning of middle school? </p><p> </p><p>Kevin answered for him, albeit a bit hesitant.</p><p> </p><p>“Just friends.”</p><p> </p><p>Joaquin looked at him curiously. He couldn’t decide whether he was to be relieved or upset. He wanted to be able to do what most couples do. He wanted to walk down the halls hand in hand, and go on actual dates to places that weren’t hidden by kudzu and ivy. </p><p> </p><p>He loved Kevin, and he believed Kevin loved him enough to stick to it through the backlash.</p><p> </p><p>And yet, he wondered if he would regret this.</p><p> </p><p>“Kev, you don’t have to lie about it.”</p><p> </p><p>Joaquin sat in the quiet for a moment, letting it wash down his face and into his head. He felt like he was about to let a river flow from his mouth.</p><p> </p><p>“We’ve been exclusive for about two and a half months. We haven’t told anybody though. We figured it might not go all that well, considering that Kev’s a Serpent and I’m not.”</p><p> </p><p>Joaquin wanted to stop, he really did.</p><p> </p><p>It didn’t seem like his mouth was going to let him.</p><p> </p><p>“And one of my best friends absolutely hates Serpents and I think that’s not right of him, obviously, but I’m not going to change his mind seeing as we saw some in Pop’s the other night and he tried to freakin fight a girl and it was kind of like a movie and—“</p><p> </p><p>“Quin, it’s okay,” Kevin started, “it’ll be okay.”</p><p> </p><p>Joaquin looked up at him, hands in his hair.</p><p> </p><p>“I just don’t want to have to lose anyone.”</p><p> </p><p>“Baby,” Kev reached back and twisted around in his seat, where Joaquin gladly accepted his open arms and practically fell into his embrace.</p><p> </p><p>“We aren’t going to lose anyone. It’s gonna work out just fine.”</p><p><br/>And as Joaquin sat there, breathing in the smell of cigarettes and <em>New Car Scent</em> car fresheners, he thought that Kevin might be right.<br/><br/></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading! :)</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading!</p><p> </p><p>You can find me on tumblr<br/>@kevin-keller-god-among-men</p></blockquote></div></div>
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